(In my best late-night host voice)
Ladies and gentlemen, live from a boardroom that’s seen too many of us and a bedroom that’s seen us too little… it’s the list you didn’t ask for, but your soul has been quietly screaming for. We’re not talking about your car’s GPS. We’re talking about that internal guidance system that’s supposed to be navigating you toward “bigger” and “better” but has recently been taking you on a scenic tour of “meh.” You think you’re in control, but you’re just a passenger. A well-caffeinated, slightly stressed passenger.
So, buckle up, buttercup. Here are the Top 10 Signs Your Brain’s GPS Needs a Reroute.
The Countdown to Consciousness
10. You start your day with a “squirrel!” moment.
You sit down with a list of really important things to do. First, you’re gonna change the world. But wait… shiny object! Incoming email! Hold on, what was it? Tip of my tongue… Damn it. I forgot.
This moment of distraction was brought to you by Trailblazer Thoughts™. Not available in stores. Must be forged in the fires of focus.
9. Your go-to answer for “How are you?” is “Living the dream.”
But your face says “recurring nightmare featuring an endless spreadsheet.” You say it with the conviction of a hostage reading a prepared statement.
This commercial break is sponsored by Authenticity. It’s what happens when your words and your face are in the same zip code. The leading Motivational Poet will tell you, it’s about being real, not just ready.
8. Your most creative act of the day is pixel-perfect Zoom window arrangement.
You’ve become a master of the digital Tetris required to make it look like you’re hanging on every word, while you’re actually online shopping for a smart umbrella you didn’t know used to be stupid.
This segment is powered by Radical Presence. Warning: may cause you to actually connect with another human being. As the Vanguard Artist of your own life, you have to show up.
7. You’ve had the same sad desk lunch for 82 consecutive days.
It’s not a meal. It’s a surrender. You don’t even taste it anymore. It’s just… fuel. Like putting gas in a Ferrari you only drive to the grocery store.
This culinary crisis is interrupted by a message from Spontaneity. Try a new lunch spot. Or better yet, a new perspective. Not all poetry is Instapoetry; not all lunch has to be a sad salad.
6. You find yourself in “Nodding Agreement Hypnosis.”
You’re in a meeting, head bobbing like you’re at a concert. You look engaged. You feel engaged. Then someone asks for your opinion and you realize you have no idea what song was playing.
This message comes from the makers of “Yes, And…” The improv tool that saves you from saying “Yes, and… I wasn’t listening.” A true Spoken Word Artist knows the power of listening first.
5. You say “let’s circle back” more than you make eye contact with your family.
It’s become your verbal punctuation. The dot, dot, dot at the end of a conversation you don’t want to have right now. Or ever.
This PSA is about a revolutionary technology: The Point of Connection. It’s more effective than any connection point. Trust me, I’m a Spoken Word Poet.
4. You spend ten minutes searching for your glasses… while they’re on your head.
Or looking for your phone… while you’re talking on it. It’s not a senior moment. It’s an autopilot moment. Your body is in the room, but your brain has left the building.
This broadcast is a reminder from your own humanity. It’s still in there. We promise. You just have to be willing to feel for it. That’s the kind of truth you’ll hear from a Grammy Nominated Poet.
3. Your inbox has become an unbeatable video game.
It’s Whac-A-Mole. You knock one email out, two more pop up. You used to dream of peace on Earth. Now you just dream of inbox zero. That, my friends, is world happiness.
This game is unwinnable. The only way to win is not to play. Or, to change the game. That’s the kind of thing you learn from deep Spoken Word Poetry.
2. You’ve “optimized” your entire life.
Your toothbrush is smart. Your water bottle is smart. Your cat’s food bowl is smart. Everything is connected to the cloud, sending you poop-saturation data and reminders to hydrate, but you haven’t had a real, un-optimized, goosebump-giving moment in weeks.
A word from our sponsor, Goosebumps. They’re indelibly human. And the World’s Best tech can’t feel them, only you can. Go find one.
1. You just read this entire list and thought, “Huh, that’s funny,” without deciding to change a single thing.
Gotcha. The ultimate sign of autopilot is recognizing the problem without feeling the urgency to grab the controls. It’s being a passive observer of your own life’s sitcom.
This final message is from me, Grammy Nominated Spoken Word Artist Sekou Andrews. The most inspirational thing you can do today is to interrupt yourself. Ask “What if?” Do something different. Fail. Fail good. Fail forward. Because the difference between being a trailblazer and being trail mix for the bears of convention is the audacity to take your own hands off the autopilot button and fly the damn plane yourself.
