They keep telling us confidence is a pose.
Stand tall. Speak up. Dress sharp. Smile wide.
They hand us formulas like costumes, like we’re auditioning for the role of “confident human being.” But I’ve performed in front of presidents and prisoners, sung verses to CEOs and street kids alike—and I’ll tell you this straight:
Confidence doesn’t live in the mask. It lives in the mirror.
Because the truth is, confidence is not a thing you perform. It’s not charisma on cue. It’s not pretending to be fearless when you’re shaking in your soul. Confidence… is consent.
It’s your permission to show up exactly as you are—flawed, fired-up, and full of truth—and still believe you belong on that stage.
I didn’t find confidence in the spotlight. I found it in the shadows—in those moments when my hands were sweating and my voice cracked, but I kept speaking anyway. That’s the confidence nobody teaches you: the kind that shows up even when you don’t feel like a “motivational speaker” or a “Grammy-nominated spoken word artist.” The kind that whispers, “Let’s go,” when every fiber of you is screaming, “Sit this one out.”
Real confidence is a decision. Not a feeling. Not a feature.
It’s the quiet courage to raise your voice when the room is silent.
It’s the rebellious act of being honest in a world that worships polished.
It’s the radical belief that your vulnerability is valuable—not in spite of, but because of your story.
In my Stage Might speaker training, I coach professionals to understand this very truth: the best corporate speakers, the most inspirational keynote presenters, are not those who say the most… they’re the ones who reveal the most.
Because we don’t connect to perfect—we connect to possible.
Your audience isn’t waiting for you to be invincible. They’re hoping you’ll be visible.
So if you’re trying to “find” confidence, stop looking outside yourself. Start listening inward.
Listen for the part of you that remembers who you are underneath the applause.
The part that doesn’t need a script to be significant.
The part that stands before the mirror—unfiltered, unedited—and says, “I am still worthy of being heard.”
That’s the real truth about confidence.
It’s not what you think.
It’s who you decide to be when the mic is live, the stakes are high, and your voice is shaking—but you speak anyway.
